College Zoom – Increase Your Admissions Success! (LA College Counselor, National Customer Base)

• Are you an international student?
• Do you lack confidence in your writing skills?
• Do you want someone to write the personal statement for you?

If so, buyer beware:

Top Seven Reasons Why Your Essay Will Not Be Worth Reading:

The best personal statements are personal.  College essays written by a third party usually suffer from the following weaknesses:

1. Underdeveloped – your content fails to adequately give depth and meaning to strengths (or excuse weaknesses) from the unwritten part of your college application or high school history
   
2. Uninspired – the author of your essay writes in a tone that robs your character of passion, insight, and authenticity.  Or worse: the author doesn’t seem to have give the story that he or she has chosen to share much thought (e.g. legitimate significance and meaning).
   
3. Superficial – your short answer essays suggest that you have a naive understanding of your intended major or career field, or desire to attend a particular college for face-value reasons.
   
4. Predictable – your essay is a standard five-paragraph essay with a thesis statement and focuses on an insignificant, weak, or over-used topic
   
5. Inconsistent – the quality (and tone) of the writing in your personal statement red-flags your application because it is suspiciously different from your standardized test writing samples, TOEFL score, grades from English class, short answer responses, or activity summary
   
6. Repetitive – your essay becomes a laundry list of recalling experiences that are already contained in your activity summary
   
7. Verbose – the author of your essay uses dazzling style, perfect grammar, or sophisticated language to try and conceal the weakness of your application’s substance

Did you know: admissions officers don’t have to actually read every essay?  The more weaknesses in your personal statement, the more likely it will be skimmed (or not read at all) past the first paragraph.  Good essays make readers want to read what you have to say.

Worst of all: because writing is a direct window into how your mind thinks, your essay is a reflection of your intellect (e.g. underdeveloped, uninspired, superficial, predictable, inconsistent, repetitive, verbose, etc.).

Q: So where does an essay written for you work best?
A: At universities that are easy to get into.

Q: Will a general essay editing service help me?

It depends. Services that will tell you what to fix, rather than actually help you fix your weaknesses, are more expensive than they are helpful. Why?  Because the analysis you get will assume that you know how to fix your essay once they identify a mistake.

Q: Will a grammar editing service help me?

Did you know: grammar counts for much less than you think and you can get grammar correction for free?

Why: International students are not evaluated and held to the same grammatical standards as Americans.  American admissions officers understand that you do not speak or write in English fluently.  Of course, your essay needs to be readable, however, professional essay editing services are a waste of money.  Find any teacher or professor who is willing to read your essay for free.  An English teacher isn’t necessary for you to get good feedback.  Any teacher will do because all American teachers and professors hold master’s degrees they earned by applying to graduate school in English.

Q: Need help with your personal statement?

When you work with College Zoom, you get more because we will show, not tell, you how to write essays that make people really like you.  We understand admissions officers and how to create emotional bonds between English learners and them through writing.  Your grades and extracurricular activities are undeniably important; however, admissions officers at America’s best universities are looking for more: character, fit, and value.  We can help you discover and perfectly articulate your character, fit, and value—clearly, concisely, and compellingly—because we get to know you intimately by working together, one-on-one.  Besides gaining essays that are powerful, fun to read, and represent the best version of you, you will also gain self-awareness, language skills, confidence, and new insights that will help you achieve greater success in college and throughout the rest of your life.